What is the Connection Between the ideals of Freedom, Choice, Agency, and Love?
Watching football this weekend like many of you, I was encouraged to see the NFL has a way of bringing awareness to the importance of love in a culture as divided as ours. They are allowing players (not demanding) to put “Choose Love” on the back of their helmets. But what is a culture of love and how do you nurture it into being? “Choose Love” at least hints in the right direction! Many people who talk about love being important are actually working against it growing in our world. This short video explains why:
(The script)
Freedom, choice, agency, and love are deeply interconnected, forming a framework through which human relationships and self-expression thrive.
Freedom is the ability to act without undue constraint, granting individuals the space to explore their desires, beliefs, and values. However, freedom gains meaning through choice—the act of selecting from available options.
Choice reflects the presence of alternatives and the capacity to weigh them, signifying the importance of personal discernment in determining one’s path. Without freedom, choice is restricted; without choice, freedom becomes abstract.
Agency is the ability to act on one’s choices, embodying a sense of control and responsibility. Agency empowers people to pursue their chosen paths with intention, aligning actions with deeply held values and goals.
When freedom, choice, and agency coexist harmoniously, love becomes a powerful force, capable of fostering growth, understanding, and unity.
Love, in this framework, represents the ultimate expression of freedom, choice, and agency. Authentic love cannot be coerced; it arises from voluntary choice. So if we want a culture based on love, it will never be realized in a culture of power and coercion.
We have to choose one or the other as the basis of our social engagement. Do we want a “winner take all” culture? Should one side force the other side into conformity to their values and practices? Or do we want a culture built on freedom, choice, and agency?
Do we value connection to all human beings and see them as equals and capable of something as powerful as love?
Built on freedom, choice, agency, and love becomes an actual usable foundation for cultural and moral choices, not just a fuzzy romantic notion. Love would decide things based the foundation of freedom to choose and the agency to act. It would rely on persuasion or reason more than power and coercion. The choice is ours in a society that still has a measure of freedom.
Choose wisely. Some questions to ask yourself before you choose:
What do I want long term, a culture that fits my preferences or a culture that allows preferences and the possibility of freely chosen love?
When my actions or the actions of others that represent me, restrict the freedoms, choices and agency of others, do I put myself in their place and think about life from their perspective or do I think that they should just be put in their place?
Am I willing to look at myself and my cultural biases and not turn them into absolutes that should be enforced on others against their will?
Am I willing show love by listening and willingness to consider options before doing something that restricts freedoms?
Have I thought through the unintended consequences of restricting freedom to make cultural and personal decisions? Think about prohibition for example, what did it actually accomplish?
Am I fighting for my rights, for my ego or for my preferences?
How am I showing actual love to people I disagree with? This is a real test of whether you want a culture of love or just a short-term win over others you think are wrong.
There is no one American culture and never has been, but the concept of equality of all people, though not practiced well for much of our history, is something we can aspire to and grow into through this kind of love. I know that this is complicated in the real world of rights, politics, and bathrooms. But love would find a way, I truly believe. I’m glad atleast the NFL thinks ”Choose Love” is a good thing to put on helmets.
It would go a long way if all of us wrote “Choose Love” first on our daily todo list.
Just sayin’.
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